What Would Dada Do? the bedtime edition
Today was our first of many days without the Dada. I won't lie -- the best part about having Dada around, bar none, is having help putting the boys to sleep. I usually can't get Jacob to sleep before Isaac, so when it's just me we approach bedtime sitting on Isaac's bed trying to read stories and say our prayers with this writhing, fussing, overtired screaming baby next to us. It doesn't work so well. Obviously with Dada, he gets one and I get the other. Without Dada, well, it's a lot noisier. Bless that Isaac for falling asleep at all, but he usually does.
I say "usually" because last night (when we still had Dada), it took him a hour and a half to fall asleep. Every 10 minutes he would get bored of being awake in his dark room by himself and he would page one of us go come in and "Go to sleep in Isaac's bed." The lucky attendant would then sit next to him for a few minutes to calm him down before excusing him- or herself to get back to the important TV watching in the basement. Then 10 minutes later...
It was the same story tonight. After the third go-round, I told him, flat out, it was time for him to go to sleep. This time I got no more pleas, but instead desperate, confessioanl screams.
Isaac (crying): I can't! I can't do it! I can't!
Mommy (huffy):'You can't' what, Isaac?
Isaac: I can't go to sleep in Isaac's bed.
Mommy: Isaac, you go to sleep every night in Isaac's bed.
Isaac: I can't I can't I can't!
Mommy: Why, Isaac? Why can't you?
Isaac: I don't know. I go to sleep in Mommy's bed.
Mommy: No. Isaac sleeps in Isaac's bed.
Isaac: I can't!
There are many potential reasons I can think of why he may have trouble falling asleep:
1) He is covered in mosquito bites. I lather him up with hydrocortisone as much as directed by the label, but he still itches. This morning after he got up, he stuck his arm out towards me and said, "Put muhsuh on." "Muhsuh?" I said. "What's that?" "Muhsuh," he said, shoving his arm further towards me. "Put muhsuh on." "I don't understand, Isaac," I said. A little frustrated, he shoved his arm at me again. "Put muhsuh on, Mommy. My owies hurt." "MEDICINE!" I said. Duh. So yeah, his bites clearly annoy him.
2) He is still working on those lower back molars. He lets me peek in there every so often, and his gums are so huge and inflamed it amazes me that he doesn't beg me to hook him up to a Tylenol tap.
3) A few nights ago, Isaac woke up having nightmares about the dark and "the wolves". This is entirely due to those ridiculous Einsteins. They used to be everybody's favorites, but now, as though they were NC-17 or something, they are prescreened by Mommy and Dada. Why? Because in every other episode, they are engineering fear into my otherwise blank-slate two-year-old. In the Einsteins movie, there is a "dark spooky cave" that is portrayed as a seriously undesirable place to be. In several episodes, there are animals that the Einsteins are clearly afraid of, including but not limited to polar bears, wolves, snakes, crocodiles, spiders, and bats. There is one episode that is entirely dedicated to Quincy's fear of the dark. Who in the holy heck is writing these? Do they know that preschoolers are going to take the Einstein's presumed fears to heart as their very own? I should so write a letter, but until then we will be taking our viewing business to PBS.
4) And then let's not forget that Isaac is fully aware that our house is not populated to its full capacity. He has been told, both by Dada and myself, that Dada is going to Seattle. So there's that disturbance in the force to contend with.
I wasn't really sure what to do to help him understand that it was time for him to sleep, and that sleep would most certainly be occuring in his own bed. In the end, I did what any sucker mom would do whose light-sleeping baby's room is right next door. I sat on the edge of Isaac's bed and rubbed his tummy, feeling its gentle rise and fall, until his eyelids finally grew too heavy and shut themselves. Let's just hope they stay shut for a good, long while tonight.
I say "usually" because last night (when we still had Dada), it took him a hour and a half to fall asleep. Every 10 minutes he would get bored of being awake in his dark room by himself and he would page one of us go come in and "Go to sleep in Isaac's bed." The lucky attendant would then sit next to him for a few minutes to calm him down before excusing him- or herself to get back to the important TV watching in the basement. Then 10 minutes later...
It was the same story tonight. After the third go-round, I told him, flat out, it was time for him to go to sleep. This time I got no more pleas, but instead desperate, confessioanl screams.
Isaac (crying): I can't! I can't do it! I can't!
Mommy (huffy):'You can't' what, Isaac?
Isaac: I can't go to sleep in Isaac's bed.
Mommy: Isaac, you go to sleep every night in Isaac's bed.
Isaac: I can't I can't I can't!
Mommy: Why, Isaac? Why can't you?
Isaac: I don't know. I go to sleep in Mommy's bed.
Mommy: No. Isaac sleeps in Isaac's bed.
Isaac: I can't!
There are many potential reasons I can think of why he may have trouble falling asleep:
1) He is covered in mosquito bites. I lather him up with hydrocortisone as much as directed by the label, but he still itches. This morning after he got up, he stuck his arm out towards me and said, "Put muhsuh on." "Muhsuh?" I said. "What's that?" "Muhsuh," he said, shoving his arm further towards me. "Put muhsuh on." "I don't understand, Isaac," I said. A little frustrated, he shoved his arm at me again. "Put muhsuh on, Mommy. My owies hurt." "MEDICINE!" I said. Duh. So yeah, his bites clearly annoy him.
2) He is still working on those lower back molars. He lets me peek in there every so often, and his gums are so huge and inflamed it amazes me that he doesn't beg me to hook him up to a Tylenol tap.
3) A few nights ago, Isaac woke up having nightmares about the dark and "the wolves". This is entirely due to those ridiculous Einsteins. They used to be everybody's favorites, but now, as though they were NC-17 or something, they are prescreened by Mommy and Dada. Why? Because in every other episode, they are engineering fear into my otherwise blank-slate two-year-old. In the Einsteins movie, there is a "dark spooky cave" that is portrayed as a seriously undesirable place to be. In several episodes, there are animals that the Einsteins are clearly afraid of, including but not limited to polar bears, wolves, snakes, crocodiles, spiders, and bats. There is one episode that is entirely dedicated to Quincy's fear of the dark. Who in the holy heck is writing these? Do they know that preschoolers are going to take the Einstein's presumed fears to heart as their very own? I should so write a letter, but until then we will be taking our viewing business to PBS.
4) And then let's not forget that Isaac is fully aware that our house is not populated to its full capacity. He has been told, both by Dada and myself, that Dada is going to Seattle. So there's that disturbance in the force to contend with.
I wasn't really sure what to do to help him understand that it was time for him to sleep, and that sleep would most certainly be occuring in his own bed. In the end, I did what any sucker mom would do whose light-sleeping baby's room is right next door. I sat on the edge of Isaac's bed and rubbed his tummy, feeling its gentle rise and fall, until his eyelids finally grew too heavy and shut themselves. Let's just hope they stay shut for a good, long while tonight.
posted by Claire at 11:08 PM
6 Comments:
Hannah gives me the Monster routine. I don't know where she came up with that.
I think it sounds like you are doing a great job! Getting them ued to sleeping in their own beds can be one of the hardest things to do.
1. My little one calls it "Medisment".
2. Orragel/ambesol is miraculous stuff.
3. I detest most "kids" shows for exactly this reason. The Einsteins are definitely on the very long do-not-watch list.
4. The best I have come up with for when I am away (and sometimes when I am there, even) is to let them have one of my shirts to sleep with that still smells of me. It seems to help.
Comforting an scared/hurting/anxious/lonely "baby" to sleep does NOT NOT NOT make you a sucker! It makes you a loving parent who is raising a little one to be certain enough in your care for them to be independent.
Well, thank you, Mr. Mix. It's always refreshing to get a compliment from a seasoned professional.
Ahh, nice to know that we are not the only household that has a bedtime routine that lasts longer than an hour. We too lay next to Clay and tell him that he needs to sleep in his big boy bed, but he runs for the door to head to "mommy's bed!" With the newest member of the weber fam fastly approaching we are trying very hard to get him to sleep in his bed through the night. I long for the days when I don't hear the swishing of a diaper running towards me at 2am.
Yeah now Liam is afraid of ants and bugs - damn those Einsteins.
I have no answers Claire. What Odd Mix said sounds like a good idea... does Isaac have a lovie? Maybe he could take a lovie to bed with him and sing it to sleep and hopefully nod off on his own.
Wow, that's a lot to handle. You might get some relief by trying the (literally) best parenting tip my wife and I ever received. You can read about it in The Five-Minute Drill. It might save you hours of sleep some night - it certainly did for us.
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